Well I never...

I don't know about you but I sometimes struggle with negative mindsets. These are detrimental to my state of being. There are some ways of thinking that I have to be aware of so as to not spiral down into a bad mood. The first negative mindset is having tunnel vision. Tunnel vision is when you only see your point of view and totally disregard others perspectives. This can be a problem whether you are in a good mood or in a bad mood. When in a bad mood it can convince you that your situation is permanent and there is no getting out. I recently received some bad news which made me very sad. I started thinking that I would never feel better about the situation despite others telling me that things will turn out okay. It wasn't until I allowed others point of view to influence me in that situation that I started to feel better. Tunnel vision can also lead to trouble when you are in a good mood. Sometimes when we are feeling good and things are going great we can sometimes make decisions based on our own ideas and think doing a particular thing would be good even when most other people are telling you that it's not. I remember a time when I wanted to trade in my car for another one even though my car at the time was completely fine. I was set on getting another car and had convinced myself of how good the idea was regardless of what others were telling me. Long story short the new car turned out to be a lemon and then I was stuck with an unreliable car. The way out of tunnel vision is to make an effort to look at all available information before coming to a conclusion. We should slow down, seek sound advice, and become more self-aware to identify if we are having a twisted view of ourselves or others.

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The second negative mindset is having all-or-nothing thinking. This one is similar to tunnel vision but it's different in the way that it describes people or events in absolute terms. I really struggle with this one personally. Every so often I feel like I'm the only one keeping the house clean and when I start to think this way, it makes me bitter towards my family, especially my husband. There are many ways you can get stuck in an all-or-nothing mentality but a very prevalent one is when we think there is only one right way to do things. When we think this way, it prevents others from meeting our standards. We inevitably end up disappointed and stressed. To change this outlook we should use more accurate ways of describing someone or something. For example, instead of me saying "I'm the only one that does anything around here", I can rephrase it and say "the house is messy and I need help getting it cleaned up". By taking this approach I can come up with solutions and limit the distorted way of looking at the situation. This prevents bitterness and resentment from growing in our lives which is very damaging to our minds.

Do you wrestle with these types of thinking? Comment below if you do and try rephrasing a negative statement that you use to demonstrate a positive way of thinking instead.